I've come to the conclusion recently that I really hate the Red Hot Chili Peppers.
In my teen years, I ranged from being mostly indifferent to them to kind of liking them. That kind of evolved into a nice period where I mostly forgot about their existence, save for every now and then when I would hear "Californication" or "By the Way" or whatever that song was called, and say to myself, "Well, it sounds like the Chili Peppers... but more like a corporate recreation of the Chili Peppers." (You could substitute "Foo Fighters" for "Chili Peppers" in that last sentence and it would work just as well, by the way.)
Now, though, I can't stand them. I think something snapped in me when Billy Preston died and I read that the last recording he played on was the latest Red Hot Chili Peppers album. Whatever happened, I can't stand them. Old Peppers, new Peppers, it doesn't matter.
Older Chili Peppers albums are like hearing what a George Clinton band would sound like if Clinton had been brainwashed by a bunch of idiotic frat guys and sodomized with a broomstick. Braindead white boy funk? They got that down! The worst rapper in the world, thrown in the mix? Check and mate!
Newer Chili Peppers albums are like hearing what would happen if some Armani-wearing douchebag with slicked back hair said to Anthony Keidis, "We'll give you a billion dollars if you water down your sound as much as possible." So now instead of moronic raps and preschool melodies about having sex and shooting heroin, we have moronic raps about... what the hell is this song about anyway?
Of course, more recently, we don't even seem to get the moronic raps. Only lazy vocals that just drift in and out of nothingness, yet seem to trigger some deep-rooted urge in people to spend money on crap. The outrageously flashy bass-playing has been similarly diluted. Flea was probably the best thing they had going for them. Now all they have is their mountains of cash, their generic songs about nothing, and that drummer who looks eerily like Will Ferrell.
This turned into a kind of formless rant, but I'll admit one thing: "Breaking the Girl" was a cool song. I'll give them that. Don't try to throw "Under the Bridge" at me as an example of a good song, though. Choirs of children are a cheesy crutch that's been overused at least since "Across the Universe" (which is a good song despite that, and really, that was only two girls or something, right?), and definitely since "Another Brick in the Wall, Part 2."
5 comments:
here's a tip for if you do not know what an RHCP song is about. Just know that the song is probably about one of the following
a. sex
b. california
c. having sex in california
-A
Hey
I actually could not agree more. Often, I find myself using Red Hot Chili Peppers as my supreme example for "horrible music." However, I think the most ingratiating thing about them is not that they're horrible, but it's that they are just so terribly mediocre and yet still manage to have about one trillion avid fans who think their music is full of artistic merit and all that other madness. It's painful that bands like them exist and manage to make as much money as they do. It just doesn't compute.
Thank you for that.
-Lauren
Say what you want about the Red Hot Chili Peppers but I like them and I don't care who knows it. I don't think they're the world's most awesome band or anything (though my brother seems to think so, but he's a silly little kid) but there are some songs that I just really enjoy. There are some songs that I just connect with: I liked them first, then they grew to be part of a whole other thing, and now when I hear those songs I like them not just cause I like the sound of them, but I like what they make me think about. I guess, what I'm trying to say is that I have a sentimental attachment to some of their songs (there's a surprise, Therese being sentimentally attached to something ridiculous, something new and different...) but I would not say that my like of rhcp is purely sentimental because I like a lot of their songs when I first hear them and then just like them more as I hear them more (though I can't stand that new Danny California song... for the love of God, if I hear that song one more time...)
Just thought I'd say that, and you can bad-mouth me all you want. I like the Red Hot Chili Peppers and own a number of their CD's and listen to them often because I enjoy them.
*badmouths you!* hehehe
just kidding
The thing that sucks is that Frusciante and Flea are brilliant musicians, to the point that RHCP could have been a classic band. Forget the frat date rape punk funk: listen to Flea on the pop songs--he's brilliant. And Frusciante is a great writer and very soulful. The latter singles, "Other Side," "Californication," are just about as good as "Breaking the Girl." Some of the rock (not funk)tunes on "BloodSugarSexMagic" were decent...
So you know where Mike Love is going with this, right? Anthony Kiedis is no Mike Love! He can't sing, his lyrics suck, and he's been doing the "LA Lakers! Fast break makers!" rap ad nauseum for 15 years now! He fucking sucks. HE is why that band sucks ass so much.
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