whyyyyyyy

Why do I know the name Hayden Panetierre? I recognize the name, I am aware that she's some kind of fantasy blond jailbait for creepy and pathetic dudes who are the type to count down until a girl's 18th birthday. I guess she's probably an actress on a show I've never seen on a network I never watch. If the network is the Disney Channel, she probably has a career singing uninteresting pop music that will sell a million copies to 12 year olds or whatever age group watches that stuff and has an easily cowed mom. I am ashamed that I am able to speculate that much and feel confident that I'm probably not too far off.

Anyway, the reason for my concern here is that I my brain works in a very strict and regimented fashion, particularly when it comes to memory, and I am allotted only a very small space to remember French-sounding last names of people who are probably not from France, and Hayden Panetiere is lodged in there now, and sooner or later I'm going to try to remember somebody who at one point had some relevance to me and I'm not going to be able to. Who was the guy who played Balki in Perfect Strangers again? FUCK! See? I had to look it up, and apparently it's Bronson Pinchot, but now that I know that, somebody else has been pushed out. If I forget Rheal Cormier or Simon Gagne, there'll be hell to pay. If she wants to push out, say, Lance Cormier, or... the French Canadian guy who plays for the Tampa Bay Lightning who isn't Vincent Lecavalier, she can feel free.... hey! It worked! All right, she can stay for now, I guess. She's probably more attractive than most hockey players anyway.