I got the new Animal Collective EP, Water Curses, recently. Today I put the CD in my computer to listen to it. iTunes could not quite identify it:

"Multiple matches were found for this CD. Choose one:

Ace of Base - All That She Wants [single]
Animal Collective - Water Curses EP"

Uhh... all right.

Mike Myers

Mike Myers.

God, just fucking stop it. Seriously.

For fuck's sake, dude. I used to think of "Sprockets" in my head and recall it fondly. Now I think "Sprockets" and think "fucking Mike Myers sucks." I don't want to look it up on YouTube for fear that I might actually find it funny.

I mean, Christ, if it's not another fucking Austin Powers movie, it's another dip in the ol' cash well for Shrek. And now this Love Guru thing. God. I don't know what the hell that horseshit is, I just know every time I see a commercial for it on TV I want to punch Mike Myers in the throat.

And let's not forget YOU, America! Why on Earth do you people keep giving this idiot money? Don't you know that only lets him keep doing this? Don't you realize that when The Love Guru has a huge opening this weekend, that only guarantees that he'll make another Cat in the Hat movie? Why are you doing this to yourselves? WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?

Plastic Ono Band

MAMA DON'T GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

DADDY COME HOME!

soapbox time!

I usually try, sometimes a little too hard, to play devil's advocate in issues. I fall pretty far to the left of the political spectrum, but if at all possible, I like to acknowledge that on many issues, there is a valid opposing viewpoint, even if I don't agree with it. (This is called being civil, which I know is an unheard of idea on the Internet.) I am pro-choice, for example, but I recognize that some people just think that it is never ok to willingly take a life, even in the form of a fetus. If anybody needs to me to run down the list of reasons why I disagree with that, I will, but that's not really where I'm going with this.

On some issues, though, there's no devil's advocate. If you are against gay marriage, I think you're flat out wrong, and I've said it before, and I'll say it again, in 50 years you will look as foolish and ignorant as you would if you stated today that a white woman should not be allowed to marry a black man. I was reading, in an article about the California Supreme Court's ruling that essentially legalizes gay marriage (at least until this fall), about a lesbian couple in their 80s who have been together for 55 years, who can finally get married (they were married in that two-week window where gay marriage was legal in San Francisco, but it was annulled when it was decided that the mayor had severely exceeded his authority). I would rather appeal to ration and common sense, but emotion will do sometimes, and I just can't imagine how anybody could look at this couple who's been waiting since the Eisenhower administration to tie the knot and tell them they shouldn't be allowed to do so.

Really, if you've got a rational and logical argument against gay marriage that doesn't involve God or your own personal squeamishness, I would very much like to hear it.

whatever makes you happy, whatever you want...

Sometimes I think that for all the amazing things they've done, Radiohead have never really topped "Creep."

Most of the time I don't really think that, but I don't think most people will argue with me if I say they've never done anything so immediate or nakedly emotional since then. Everybody in the world loves that song, with the possible exception of Radiohead themselves.

That song is kind of an anomaly, now that I think about it. It came out in the middle of the grunge era, when mainstream music was dominated by somber bands that were all about pathos and self-pity and nihilism, (for an intolerably boring example, see the Stone Temple Pilots song of the same name, released a year earlier), and along comes this band of goofy-looking British dudes aping REM and U2, and they blow everybody else out of the water, almost by accident. Apparently they weren't even going to put "Creep" on Pablo Honey, which sounds strange, considering that it's basically one of the two really good songs on that album. Eventually Radiohead took a few astronomical leaps forward, but they're always going to be associated with "Creep," whether they like it or not.

"Dick Laurent is dead..."

One of the earlier CDs I ever bought with my own money was the soundtrack to the movie Lost Highway. At the time, I didn't have a clue who David Lynch was, I just wanted it because it had a great non-album Smashing Pumpkins song on it, and I kind of liked Nine Inch Nails' "The Perfect Drug" too. It also had Lou Reed, David Bowie, Marilyn Manson, Rammstein (pre-"Du Hast"), and all that crazy Angelo Badalamenti noir-jazz that's in every David Lynch movie. It took me another few years to really care about Lou Reed and David Bowie too, although I at least knew who they were when I was 14.

So tonight, I finally watched the movie, after it was finally released on DVD last month and after I read a couple "wait, maybe we got this wrong" articles about the DVD release by critics, who generally hated it in 1997.

It's an all right movie, I guess. It's unmistakably a David Lynch movie, like everything he does. It's got quite a few "what the hell is this person doing in this movie?" moments; Robert Blake, Henry Rollins, Richard Pryor, Robert Loggia, Marilyn Manson, and Gary freakin' Busey all turn in supporting roles. I found it to be a lot more low-key than the rest of his stuff. First viewings of a David Lynch film are always a little confusing, but they're usually not difficult to stay interested in, like this one was. I would say Lynch fans should watch it, and if you're not a Lynch fan, you're not going to watch it anyway.

Anyway, I really just wanted to show you all this clip, because it's a good example of why we should probably all be terrified of Robert Blake. This thing rivals Daniel Plainview drinkin' up milkshakes in terms of the whole "what the fuck this is insane/awesome" thing.



Supposedly Blake is completely responsible for the way that character looks and acts, which, just... yeesh. Check the huge 1997 cell phone too.

I kinda like how Phillies-Mets is a legitimate rivalry now. For a while it seems like we've really hated the Mets, but the Mets had bigger things to worry about, which fueled the inferiority complex that we Philly fans have, which generally manifests itself as loathing New Yorkers for being such fatheaded smug assholes. So there was no small amount of pleasure in the Phillies not only winning the division last year, but doing it over the New York Mets, who set a new standard for incompetence with the worst season-ending skid ever (finally getting, who else, the '64 Phillies off the hook). Even after the Phillies got swept by the Rockies in the playoffs, it wasn't heartbreaking, because the Phillies were division champs, and the Mets fans had to wallow in disgust all winter long, and we have bragging rights for a whole year. And now Phillies-Mets is a big-ticket rivalry, and Fox's game of the week.

I think that's pretty cool. As long as the Phillies start winning some damn games here.